How Many?

Wednesday's retrieval went fine & I'm doing better than I did last time. I'm still in pain & on bed rest but at least I could walk downstairs slowly for dinner. I miss spending time with our son but it's good that family is taking care of him now. My hubby & I both have full blown colds which doens't help matters.

They only managed to get three mature eggs so we have three embryos for transfer. We won't know the grade (i.e. how likely they are to take) of the embryos until the day of transfer. After which, I'm on bed rest for two more days. We just have to hope for three A's & remember that only one needs to take.

Afternoon Delight

Monday afternoon at the park with Grandma!

"It's time for a cooler ride."

"It's only you & me now."

"How to use a digger"

Rides of all sorts!

This was the fun at the Apple Basket Festival where I also found a beautiful hemetite necklace very well made for only $9!

Our son loves pony rides!

I can't wait to get him to take him horseback riding when he's older!

A thrill ride with Grandpa!














Our son mimics the calf!













Our son check out the clown's robotic chicken with Grandma.

There's a slide where down the mountain?

The Alpine Sled!

The innocent bystanders...












Or not so innocent!













Daddy lets his son take control!












Mommy holds tight onto her son as they slide in!

Bottom of the Hill

A family picture as the mouth of the Mississippi River gapes behind us!












My father-in-law embraces the man purse!


Okay, actually it's his wife's. But it's a funny picture, eh?














Father & son zone as they ride the ski lift one last time.

The Myth That Is Reality!

I couldn't believe it but I actually found a clean port-a-potty that didn't grive me the creeps being in! Check out how clean this is & it's in use!

Sights above land

A beautiful afternoon at Chestnut Mountain!

Run! It's the turkey vultures!














A groundhog gets curious!

Big mistake

Yesterday morning I woke up & my son's first cold in months hit me hard. (I'm still foggy in the brain & feeling awful because of it.) I went for my tests yesterday morning. Shortly before I got there I made plans with a friend for yesterday evening. At the doctor I found out that my procedures we're probably going to be moved up a couple of days & we would probably be starting preparations that evening. Of course I got excited & forgot about my plans with my friend. I picked up my son then decided to take him to a movie since he was going to be stuck at home with me for a few weeks after the procedure. Afterwards my dad spent some time with his grandson while I had a nice visit with an old teacher. When Mom came home, we all went out for my parents' anniversary. It was while I was trying to rush so we get home to do our scheduled shot that I remembered about my plans with my friend. I felt so horrible & there was nothing I could say or do.

After dinner I started feeling sick & had to pull over on the side of the highway. It was only dry heaves but I was nauseas the whole way home. Once we got home, it was lay down, here's your shot & fall asleep. Some good & bad parts throughout the day.

Different people

Someone pointed out to me recently how I had become a different person since I became a mother.  After hearing her point of view, I tend to agree with her.  It's not such a good thing either.  I've become very selfish with my time for many reasons, none of which are right. 

 

Since I'm at home with a toddler all day, it may appear that I have more free time than others but it's not always as it appears.  On occasion that's true but not in general.  I still keep house, make sure he's fed, put him down for naps, etc, during each day.  I wouldn't change being a stay-at-home mom but it's still a job. 

 

I like to get out of the house as often as possible most of which are to run errands or go on outings as a family.  I keep reminding myself that he's only this age once.  On the rare occasion when we have a night alone, it's tough to choose between going out with friends or going on a date with my hubby.  When I do run errands with my son alone, it typically ends up being an all day thing.

 

I no longer have the same amount of energy for my free time with friends (or even my hubby) as I used to.  Raising a toddler does that to you.

 

None of these reasons validate ignoring or hurting my friend's feelings.  It's not like one is more important than the other.  It's just that I haven't figured out how to balance that time out.  After my procedures, that is what I need to figure out because I do not want to lose my friends even if we're in different life stages.  It is something I want to fight for.

Driving

Today we had a lazy day & hung around until we drove around the country a bit. I finally got my hair cut shoulder-length because it was driving me so crazy! Yet I can still put it up for those times when I don't feel my best. My hubby likes it too because it's not too short.

The easy part

I've been really out of touch lately because we've had been changing our internet provider & with all the hormones being pumped into me, I'm uncomfortable to the point of pain when I move around.  Therefore I don't make it to the very often.  Once my hubby connects the internet together & I can access pictures, some will be posted.  I will try to write some tomorrow afternoon.

 

I know some of you may find all this IVF talk boring or annoying but hey, this is my life & what's going on primarily.  This is me now.  In the meantime, I keep reminding myself that this is still the easy part!  LOL

No pics lately

For those of you who enjoy the pictures I post, I apologize for the lack of them. I have some which I will be posting later (hopefully - assuming we still have internet access after our transition). I got some good ones too for you all. So just be patient. :-)

Progression is good!

Yesterday our son woke up late & so did we! So although I ran late & had to wait, my doctor was gracious enough to get me in for my tests still. The ultrasound technician was different than the normal one & had a perky bedside manny which I like. The test results came back good. Although I'm feeling uncomfortable, there are some follicles close to being mature with some small ones still. So in a few days I go back for another round of tests. Looks like next week will be when I get my retrieval done (if nothing unexpected comes up). Then a few days later... the transfer! This is nice how it's happening so much quicker.

My hubby got the okay to work from home the day of the retrieval since his project is due that day. We're also working on trying to find a relative to take care of our son at home with me while I'm recovering from the IVF retrieval & transfer. My hubby can't afford the time off work & we don't want to pay for a full-time babysitter for a week. My dad's was laid off so he might help us out. I'm hoping to get a few relatives to help out though so no one's committed for too long.

After the doctor's, I went to my hubby's parent's house where Grandma was watching my son. We spent some time together & then went to the park together. Afterwards we left, my son was getting cranky so we napped in the car for a couple of hours & then ran some errands before retuning home.

Caught in the webs of time

Black & Blue

Things are going okay here. Monday I received my first blood test which ended up bruising (as you can see from the picture). I think the other blood test I got yesterday on the other arm is going to bruise too. It's only the start of all the frequent blood tests too. I don't seem to as easy as I used to to get blood from. That kind of sucks but not much I can do about it. I can only imagine what people will think about all my bruises though! LOL

The shots are okay. They still sting & make me cry a bit but I'm trying to relax more & remember that this is still the easy part. I'm definately uncomfortable. I feel about three months pregnant. I even have the perks of feeling like I'm roasting when the house is 70 degrees. Right now my ideal seems to be about 65 degrees. Now my hubby is getting cold at night because I'm the one throwing off all the covers. LOL

I like to think my moods haven't been too bad & I've been keeping them under control. If I'm being quiet, it's usually because I'm feeling grouchy & don't want to say anything I'll regret. Then again, you'd probably need to ask my hubby how moody I am. I doubt he would tell me the truth in fear of another roller coaster ride of emotions. I can't blame him.

No comparison

When we compared the needles for my stomach shots to the pen needle, there was no comparison.  The pen was MUCH shorter.  That's the way it goes though.  My test results came back normal on Monday so we got the okay & were told to start the stimulation.  My regular morning shot already hurts so when we added the second morning shot, that really stings.  It takes awhile before I can move comfortably.  In the evening, I get a second shot which also stings.  So far, all the shots are in my stomach (which is starting to look like a connect the dot drawing).  Soon we start doing the really fun shots in the butt with a longer needle.  Those always made me cry.  I'm really not looking forward to those.  But the outcome for all of this... will be worth it all!

The right to change

As a woman does with regular consistency, I decided to change my mind about having a busy day.  After leaving the house at 7:45 am for my dr's appointment, everything went smoothly.  It was nice that my hubby watched our son so I didn't have to drop him off somewhere.  Anyhow we'll get the test results later this afternoon.  I'm not worried though.  Basically it just verifies that we're clear to start the aggressive part of the IVF process. 

 

I met my hubby afterwards at his work to pick up our son from him.  They had a good morning together & Daddy got some errands done while our son behaved very well for him.  I was hoping to nap when our son did when we got back home (instead of doing visits, errands & outings) but he was already sleeping when I got him.  Of course he woke up as soon as we got home. Ah well.

 

Then I spent the morning unpacking maternity clothes to prepare.  I've hung them up in the other closet for easy access when I need them.  I received some nice maternity clothes from my sister & somebody on freecycle; plus I found one of my boxes with maternity clothes in the basement.  I think I have another one somewhere down there too.

 

Next is sorting my son's wardrobe in 3T which I bought (received some items from freecycle) on Friday.  I lucked out finding a great garage & school sale.  I also got a few 4T so I just need to sort those out.

 

I'm off!

All about observation

Our son loved the pony rides at the apple basket festival today. He loved having Grandma beside him too. He napped on the way home after lunch only to wake up when we got back to the house. After watching a movie & resting with me, he played with his toys & tried multiple times to 'ride' his grandparent's dog like a horse! Then when Daddy came back to the house after his business meeting, he attached to him like a starfish to glass! As we drove home tonight, it started pouring cats & dogs right before we had to bring our sleeping toddler into the house in the rain. It worked okay but it took a little bit to get him back to sleep. Luckily that is Daddy's specialty!

Tomorrow is early morning so I better get going. We have a busy day planned! I'll try to post some pics from the weekend later Monday night or Tuesday morning. Hope everyone had a good weekend!

Petting Zoo

The other day I noticed this seasonal petting zoo at Johansen Farm in Bolingbrook. When I looked at their website they have so many activities for kids of all ages. Some of the few things they have are a bouncer, train rides, air slides, pony rides (in Oct) & a corn maze. All of the activies appear to be free with admission which is only $7-8 per person! We're definately going to go there some time!

Toss & turning

Last night our son did not sleep well. After waking up in the middle of the night initially, he repeatedly fell asleep & woke up. My hubby was so patient taking care of him last night so this morning I told him to go sleep while I watched our son. When I told him that he could have woken me up last night to take over, he said I deserved a night off too. How sweet is that? Now the rest of the house sleeps.

Later this morning we're going to an Apple Basket Festival. They'll have pony rides which our son loves. My hubby's grandparent's are going to see his face light up for the first time when he rides the pony. It's always heartbreaking for me to watch these ponies. I always have to believe that they're treated right but then I could just be closing my eyes to the problem.

Down the drain

This morning our son used his potty training seat. When we emptied it into the toilet, he flushed & asked it "Where you going?" It was very cute!

In a maze

I recently heard about this great corn maze at Kuipers Family Farm that my son & I are going to this fall. It's supposed to be the largest one in the area. We'll see!

Down we go!

This afternoon we went to Chestnut Mountain where there is the Alpine Sled. It's basically this huge slide on individual sleds. We went three or four times. Our son absolutely loved it. Of course, he's a total thrill seeker even at the age of two! After each ride, you ride the ski lift back up the mountain. While I was nervous because of the heights, our son was camly sitting there pointing out trees, birds, flowers, etc. It's nice to know he doesn't have that fear. Then again he jumps off sofa arms without hesitation so I shouldn't be surprised.

For dinner we went to Happy Joe's where they have a miniature train that goes around the border of the room. Our son does love trains!

Forever changing

My hubby & I were talking last night about how everyone's parenting styles change as you & your children get older. It's not something you realize. It just happens. The point is that throughout the changes is that you are responsible for being the best parent you can be to your child. You are the one shaping them & showing them what kind of person to be for the rest of their life. It's not an easy task but one that is worthwhile when you watch your grown children raising their own children. I would like to feel that pride & joy in my heart when my hubby & I are older & watching our son with his kids. In the meantime, I will enjoy our son's every giggle & smile as he grows inch by inch & someday taller than me.

Is it a choice?

Some people choose to become parents & for others it happens by accident. Yet what does it mean to be a parent? Being a parent doesn't mean just creating a child; it also means being there for your child every moment of every day & creating the best life you can for him or her. It's not like playing house for a few months. It's a life-altering responsibility with rewards that expand your heart without limits, changes the way you live your life & what your priorities are. It's an amazing experience that will let you see everything in new ways. You just have to open your heart & mind to it. Let it happen & feel the magic for years to come!

Strong Love

Lately I was thinking about when my hubby & I got together years ago. What was it that he found attractive about me? He's told me that it was because I was friendly, pretty & outgoing (among other things). How have I changed since then? I like to still think I'm all those things. I may be older but I like to still think I'm relatively attractive, even if I have that mom-look most the time. After staying at home taking of our son & home for the past couple of years, I'm now more serious because of my responsibilities. It's also made me more reclusive in some ways. I don't find it as easy to integrate myself into social events anymore. I actually find I have to work at it some which I'm not used to. Then there's also the matter of trying to find topics to talk about that aren't baby-related.

I know we all change as we get older & so does love sometimes if you take it for granted. My hubby & I don't ever forget that (even if we get busy sometimes). My hubby still has the same qualities he did when I fell in love with him. He's funny, loyal, attentive, passionate & supportive. As he's gotten older, he also has changed & I only love him more because of it. Fatherhood has made him more responsible & thinking about future planning; not to mention it brings out this boyish fun side of him that I find adorable (when I'm not in a rush to get things done).

Yes, we do change as we get older & if you don't work together then your love will weaken over time. It take two people to keep your love together strong. I believe the qualities that you found attractive in each other initially should still be attractive in the other person after years of being together.

So although I'm a different person in some ways than when I met my husband, I think I've also changed in some ways for the better. I'm more confident, self-reliant & willing to adapt to change than I used to be. So now I have more to give to him & our son. I love them both so much & that will never change.

A Light in the distance

A few weeks ago, we were driving to my in-law's late at night. Along the way, we pass many farms. It was around midnight & all of the famrs we passed were lit up like everyone was wide awake. I don't know if it was because it was a certain time of the year for harvesting or something. I generally thought farmers typically got up at the crack of dawn (or right before) but not in the middle of the night. Very curious I say.

Birthday wishes

Yesterday evening we had dinner with my family to celebrate my youngest sister's 24th birthday. Although my brothers could not make it because they live out of state, we had a great funny time. I'll post some pictures next week. It was nice having everybody together again. That's hard to do these days.

Being productive

Yesterday turned out to be a great day. First my son & I left the house to pick up some freecycle items, including some 3T & maternity clothes. While doing so, I was keeping an eye out for garage sales when I hit gold. A woman was selling 3T & 4T clothing (all season) for $1 a piece! I practically cleaned her out since our son needs everything in 3T. When she heard our son had grown out of his 2T clothes so quickly, she went & found some more 3T clothing for me. How cool is that?

Then we hit a local school that was having an semi-annual clothing sale. There our son behaved so quietly & waited patiently in his stroller while I manage to pick out some 3T & some 4T clothing; enough for this fall/winter season I believe. The prices were very reasonable too!
Next week I'm going to pack up his 2T pants (which now look like capris when his bends his knees) & sort through the 3T clothing. The remainder 4T clothing I can pack up for his next growth spurt!

I can't tell you how happy I was to find this badly needed clothing for our son. It's such a relief. That also means we'll only need a few items at our local school semi-annual clothing sale in a few weeks. The other reason this is so great is because I wasn't looking forward to picking a whole new wardrobe within a week after my IVF transfer. It's so much easier this way.

Funky face dance

"You're gonna wonder about me, babe
You're gonna wonder about me."










"I'm learning how to smile
Like I just don't care"









"Nobody,
can know the,
trouble I,
get into..."












"Your love is driving me crazy, crazy, crazy"












"But don’t forget it’s just a ride"











"Life is ever so strange
It’s good for a change"












"If you're gonna fly away
Don't fly without me"











"I'm possessed, ooh
And I don't know what 2 do"









"You bring me love
Like the sun on the brightest day
You shine a ray of light on my heart
I like what you do and I'm always going to cherish you"









"Take me, take me, get me out of here
Come down please come help me out"












"Sitting here thinking about what
What everything means to me
Do I want it all
Can I take it all"

What can I get into?

This morning our son got into a box of his old clothes (which he threw about the room), the toilet brush (which he flung all over our bathroom walls, toilet & tub) the toothpaste (which was placed by the toilet brush so we have no idea what he did with that) & finally spilled something on the activity room rug (which was clear & didn't smell like anything; very suspect). All this before 10 am! So after my hubby gave me my shot this morning, I put the clothes back in the box, cleaned the bathroom floor, tub (which I actually have to bleach now because scrubbing didn't work), toilet & walls, & then threw away the toothpaste, toilet brush & remainder cleaning up materials. When I checked the rug, paper towels weren't soaking anything up. Weird.

While I'm doing all this, hubby was teasing me even though he knows I'm very moody these days. In general if I'm feeling moody these days, I keep my mouth shut. It generally works unless you have your husband needling you just to annoy you. Finally he went too far & my top blew. Luckily he left for work then.

After he left, I was still cleaning & had an issue with something. I can't even remember what now. Then I huffed & puffed. Finally I finished where I found our son absorbed in tv. Right there I decided we needed to start the day fresh. So into the shower we went. Our son played with his toys on the shower seat (he's doing much better being under the water now) & I was able to relax in the shower. It was just what we needed.

Afterwards our son was exhausted & went straight to sleep after getting dressed. While he slept, I labeled & sealed boxes of clothes to store in the basement. That leaves me with quite a few boxes outside our bedroom which my lucky hubby gets to carry to the basement tonight.

I still need to decide if I'm going to store his 2T shirts (which still fit but are getting tight over the head) & pants (some which may fit & others not but most just aren't long enough anymore). We still have a few more weeks until the local school clothing sale where our son practically needs a new wardrobe in 3T! I'm not looking forward to that price tag. Until then, I just need to start checking resale shops to cover us until then. At least some of his 2T onsies are fitting so we can use them for pjs because his sleepers are skin tight on him since he's so tall!

No tears please!

Last night while my hubby was making dinner, I started laughing non-stop at our son's extremely tight sleeper. It was basically skin tight which I found hilarious for some unknown reason. I dropped to the floor because I was laughing so hard & our son came to join me. There we played while I kept laughing at various things. I'm sure all along my hubby was thinking, "Please don't start crying!"

Oh these hormones are fun!

Wishes

"Cover your eyes, whisper my name
Join in my mystical game.
I'll make a wish, believe in me,
You'll never be the same..."


This is definately my favorite post so far. After hundreds, that's means a lot I think.

Tattoo fun

Today my son & I had fun putting on tattoos. Then of course he resisted his afternoon nap until several hours later than usual. He finally did go down & then slept for three hours! I was able to get a lot done on my project during that time. When he woke up, he played with his toys in his bedroom for about fifteen minutes, called for me, went into bedroom & started watching tv where I found him.

This evening before dinner, daddy was able to make it home before 8 pm so we were able to take a late bike ride to a nice local park. Our son played with the same boy he did last time. When the train came by, they both loved it!

Comfort

Today I was fortunate to nap when our son did which definately helped. Even our cat relaxed in our son's Elmo chair!

Letters

I think I prefer to write letters & notes by mail versus email.  It's more personal.  You know who you are so expect one in the mail soon.  Hopefully it'll clear things up between us.

Like a rock!

Last night I was so tired that after I put our son to bed, I went straight to bed myself. By 9:15 pm, I was fast asleep & slept like a rock all night. That was after a two hour nap during the day!!!!

On better news, the shot didn't hurt this morning. My hubby found a good technique I think. Such a good man.

Laughter

Today at story time, our son was eating his snack when he noticed some crumbs on the floor from himself & other kids.  So he stops eating, keeps his cookie in hand & then starts wiping the crumbs on the floor with his napkin in an effort to clean it.  There I stood & couldn't help laughing.  It was so funny that I almost started crying.  That's hormones for you.

When you want to feel sexy!

***Your Sexy Brazilian Name is:***

Kaliana Montenegro

What's Your Sexy Brazilian Name?
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Life Experience

***You've Experienced 52% of Life***

You have a good deal of life experience, about as much as someone in their late 20s.You've seen and done enough to be quite wise, but you still have a lot of life to look forward to.

How Much Life Experience Do You Have?
http://www.blogthings.com/howmuchlifeexperiencedoyouhavequiz/

Cruddy weather

The weather at my in-law's this weekend was so cruddy. Let's see, how can I sum it up? I know... wet & cold. So were were stuck inside all weekend which doesn't do much for a restless two year & moody mama.

Yep, I'm getting moody. Saturday I started my IVF medication & definately started feeling it. The first shot was bad. The second hurt. The third wasn't too bad because we tried it a different way. This is an experiment in the works you can say. One of the side effects is mood changes. Lucky me (& my hubby)! Yesterday I was driving while listening to my Miss Siagon soundtrack. I find it a heart-pulling during regular moments so of course I literally sobbed throughout the cd. Ugh. Today I decided to watch the World Trade Center preview & started crying again. My son saw me, came up & said "why you frying? you frying." I explained how Mama was a little sad & he came up on my lap & gave me a big tight hug for at least 30 seconds while patting my back. He's so sweet. I'm so blessed to have him as our son.

Forget about it!

It's so frustrating when someone misunderstands one sentence you say, then proceeds to make a huge deal out of it while you're oblivious to anything going on. Even more so, it's annoying when someone else misunderstands a comment then tells someone else their own misunderstanding of it. That so pisses me off. The only thing you can do is forget about it until they ready to deal with it. That's life.

Giddy up!

This evening my son & I got to pet a tame horse who someone was riding down our street. My son's eyes just lit up when he saw that. Afterwards we talked to a neighbor for a while who commented on how tall my son is getting. That he is... he's already half of my height now! Then we both got kisses from our neighbor's doggy. I love it when my son giggles like that.

To end the day, my son even went potty in his training toilet! Whahoo!

Daunting tasks

Today I received my IVF medication & went through all of it on the phone with some help. Although my stomach gets nervous at the thought of all those shots again, I'm getting very excited about getting pregnant again. (BIG SMILE) I can't wait to feel that life (maybe two if we're lucky!) growing inside me. I don't even mind getting big because I know my hubby will love me & think I'm beautiful regardless; either that he's just telling me that so I don't over-react. LOL Nah, he's a good man & I know he loves me.

Quiet celebration

Last night my in-laws came to the house to baby-sit our son so my hubby & I could go out to celebrate our wedding anniversary. We went to a wonderful local restaurant called Sorrento's where we've actually eaten twice before. Each time though, our son has been nuts so we've never gotten really to enjoy our food there. The evening specials were prime rib & BBQ ribs, both which were excellent. The ribs fell right off the bone & had a perfect BBQ sauce.

Since we had some time to kill before our movie, we snuck inside the house (so our son wouldn't see us & get upset), put our food away & ran to Walmart for a few needed items. Aren't we romantic? LOL

Then it was off to see the movie Step Up which was a general feel good movie. A good date movie. It was the typcial dance plot. There's a problem, the consequences, the challenge, the change & finally the success. Individual scenes make it each dance film unique in how they go from one step to another. I liked it though.

When we got home, my hubby's parents' told us how our son was running bases with another toddler at the park. Evidently this kep him amused for a long time, until dark!

After the game

Monday we went to the Cougar game with my parents & nephews. Our son was a little restless but had a ball running the bases afterwards!













My nephew & son exchange bear hugs!!!















As you can tell from my son's beaming face, he loved the big slide along with both bouncers.















My son took his sweet time going through the children's obstacle course. He kept going through the tunnels until Daddy convinced him to go down the slide.











My nephews were anxious to get autographs from some of the players.


After the game, we headed back to my folks. There my son & I napped while Daddy worked on my parents' computers. Mom then made us a yummy dinner before we headed home.

Six weeks old!

My brother & his adorable son.











Can you tell by my nephew's shoes that
my brother's a Bears fan?

Wet & Wild!

Saturday afternoon/evening we hung out with relatives for a family BBQ. At the private location, there was this awesome beach where we had a blast. Although at the end of the day, we forgot how quickly the sun tires you out. Everyone had a blast though.




Now Mommy & Daddy get to swing me! In the water even! Bonus!!!!












Somebody catch me!!!!

Love in the Afternoon

My hubby & I relish a moment alone.













My uncle & his wife enjoy the sun. We had fun exchanging camping stories!

Sandy beaches

Grandpa listened & followed our son's request to bury him up to his neck in the sand. Now our son wonders, "Should I stay or should I go?"











Our son counts to three & then up he goes!














I can always count on my shadow to be by my side.